My little boys were so tiny and precious. I need to get some of this out. Writing seems like it might help.
Liam and Conner...much loved by their mommy and daddy, born 7/2/07. They're perfect. What else can I say? There aren't any 2 babies more loved. They could have been anything. They get to be angels.
There are a million what ifs going through my head. What if I went to the hospital sooner? What if I rested more? Drank more water? Did I miss something? Did I eat something bad?
My job for the first nine months was to just keep them safe. My heart is breaking because I couldn't do that. I got them all to myself for 5 months. I got to see pictures. I heard their little hearts beat. I would do anything for a chance to do it all again. I would give up the rest of my life if they could just have theirs. This pain is terrible.
I got to hold them both. I kissed them both. I told them mommy loved them.
Now I have to go on. Without them.
Liam, Conner, mommy loves you. She always will.